Every C down in C-ville was excited for Christmas,

But the PM who worked in O-town was not.

 

Every Canadian pundit would be ablaze Christmas season,

And for once, Donald Trump is not the reason.

 

It could be, perhaps, that the PM’s deficit was too great,

It could be that his new custom socks order was late.

 

But what I think it was, that the PM found scary,

Was an investigation, by a commissioner named Mary.

 

But, whatever the reason, his sin or his socks,

He knew if exposed, Canadians would cry, “this is bollocks!”

 

“And then! Oh, the news! Oh, the news! News! News! News!

There’s one thing I dread! All the NEWS! NEWS! NEWS! NEWS!

 

They’ll share posts on Facebook, with criticisms ringing!

The opposition will stand hand-in-hand, their MPs will start singing!

 

And they’ll sing! And they’ll sing! And they’ll SING! SING! SING! SING!”

And the more the PM though of this Tory Christmas Sing,

The more the PM thought, “I must divert attention from this whole thing.”

 

Then he got an idea! An expensive idea!

The PM got a wonderful, costly idea!

 

“I know just what to do!” The PM declared with a wink,

“Right by Rideau Canal, I’ll build another ice rink!”

 

Built right outside the Hill, with a cost overrun,

There it stood, the rink that forgot fun.

 

“Soon those critics will learn, soon they’ll finally get it!

When they check out the polls, and there’s no Tory spirit!”

 

He knew JUST what they’d say: “Boo hoo HOO! The public does not care about lower taxes!

Farmers’ expenses will rise while Morneau just relaxes.”

 

“That’s a sign,” grinned the PM, “That the opposition is coming short.”

But then things fell apart, with the release of a Conflict of Interest report.

 

He hadn’t stopped the news from coming! It came!

Even after the House rose, it came just the same!

 

It became public that the PM violated four points of the ethics act,

So he gave an apology in front of reporters, delivered with tact.

 

The Ethics Commissioner doubted the Aga Khan was his friend,

And the Conservative Leader was worried that this might be a trend.

 

The NDP leader was disappointed that the PM broke the law,

While the Tories, once again full of spirit, cried out “HURRAH!”

 

But for now, everyone, enjoy some holiday cheer,

As we await more on this scandal, in Question Period next year.